Storehouse of Laughter – Chapter 10



Old leather face

A group of people were idly speculating about what was the hardest thing in the world. Someone said “rock”, but another pointed out that rocks could be smashed. Someone said “gold”, but another said that gold can be worked. Finally, someone pointed to a bearded man, and said: “The hair in that old chap’s beard is the hardest thing in the world. Gold and rock cannot compare.” When asked why, he replied: “It had to bore through that leathery old face of his.”



A common saying goes: “Numb leg, to the toes / bring it up, with the nose.” If one’s leg has gone numb, then the remedy is to stick a stalk of miscanthus on the nose. Knowing this, someone stuck a stalk on his forehead. When asked why he did this, he replied: “My buttocks have all gone numb.”




A blind man was sitting in a group, when they saw something funny and laughed. The blind man laughed along. The others asked: “Why did you laugh if you couldn’t see what it was?” The blind man replied: “If you lot were laughing, it must have been pretty funny.”

Worldly people all laugh at the blind man. But those who only know how to paint by numbers (lit. copy the drawing of a gourd), or who never deviate from old models, or who follow others slavishly — these are all blind people too.



Smelly feet

A pedicurist took off a customer’s shoes, but the feet stank so horribly that he fanned them frantically with his hands. When the customer asked why he wasn’t starting with the pedicure, he replied: “I’m waiting till the feet cool down.”


Smelly feet (2)

A man was about to receive guests, when he smelled a horrible stench. He called his servant boy and asked him what it was. The servant boy whispered into his ear: “Madam has taking off her shoes.” The man lowered his voice and said to him: “Even if she is taking off her shoes, that need not be the source of the smell.” The servant boy once again whispered to him: “She’s taken off both her shoes.”



Big feet

A big-footed woman was riding a sedan-chair, but her feet were dangling on the outside. The chair-bearer was embarrassed by this, and asked her if she could draw her feet inside. She replied: “If I could have, I would have done so already.”



Big genitals (2)

Someone died and went to see the Lord of Hell. He sentenced him to be reborn as a donkey. The man disputed this at length, and was finally allowed to return to the mortal world in his original form. But a mistake caused him to be returned to human form except for his genitals, which remained those of a donkey. When he awoke, he wanted to go back to Hell and ask for his body to be completely restored, but his wife advised him: “The Lord of Hell is not fond of debate. Let’s just leave it as it is.”


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